Preserving our humanity

Many factors of modern life are conspiring to steal our humanity, and that is particularly concerning now, when we need our humanity the most.

According to Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary, humanity is compassionate, sympathetic, or generous behavior or disposition; the quality or state of being humane.  Unfortunately, these days I’m feeling a lack of sympathy and generosity, and I blame three main contributors.

First, social media. We foolishly think in this time of social distancing that Facebook posts or Instagram likes or Snap stories can keep us connected. We are wrong. Research shows that using social media can contribute to anxiety and poor self-esteem. It also shows that communication via texting cannot replace the benefits of actually having a conversation with someone, either as a voice call or an in-person discussion. A laughing emoji is a poor substitute for a smile on a loved one’s face.

Also, social media platforms reward extreme statements and strong ideological stances. They do little to encourage nuanced dialogue or empathetic interaction. Facebook claims its mission is to bring people together, but scrolling through posts and comments often reveals more vitriol than compassion. So while it continues to be wildly popular, social media does little to promote our humanity.

Second, and closely linked to the problem of social media, we have the current political climate. Politicians and leaders on both sides distill complicated issues into their simplest and most dramatic elements, leaving no room for discussion or compromise. An all or nothing mentality pervades public conversation, which dismisses moderation and suggests that every American must claim one of two opposing and hostile perspectives. Such a simplistic approach to policy and attitudes does not acknowledge our humanity.

Third, we are living in a pandemic, which means every day we are assaulted with data about the virus. We hear statements like, “over five million infected” and “at least 160,000 dead” so often that the numbers have lost their meaning. We fail to grasp that “160,000” includes wives, grandfathers, neighbors, and friends – unless we are forced to. Perhaps we don’t want to closely consider the human toll of this virus, because to do so would be too depressing.

Another unfortunate side effect of the coronavirus is that the very things we must do to prevent its spread – social distancing, limiting contact, wearing face coverings- also diminish our connection to each other. But social distancing does not have to mean social isolation. Now, more than ever, we must find safe and effective ways to connect that preserve public health as well as our need for interaction.

As humans, we are complicated and nuanced. We are inconsistent and conflicted, and yet we need each other, flaws and all, to survive.  We must accept differences and discrepancies, both within ourselves and within our communities, if we are going to function as a society. We must humbly bring the best of ourselves to every interaction with the goal of bringing out the best in the people around us. That means showing compassion to those who are neglected and generosity to those with whom we disagree. That means calling instead of commenting, writing a letter instead of dictating a text, and showing up in ways that are safe and meaningful for people we love and people we don’t even know. 

We must fight to preserve our humanity.

Thanks for getting nerdy with me!

Julia Tomiak
I believe in the power of words to improve our lives, and I help people find interesting words to read. Member of SCBWI.

5 Comments

  1. An excellent essay that sees beyond the clutter of of noisy FB posts and addresses the more important concerns of simple humanity. In fact, it is so good, I am going to post a link to it on my FB page. But, don’t expect any big surge in readership; it is not though I am really any “influencer.” LOL.

    The wearing of masks during the pandemic is a good example of the need for humanity. Seeing that the opinion on whether masks are effective falls along political lines, it is rather obvious that most people are forming their opinion about their effectiveness on the basis of political concerns rather than medical concerns. I am very skeptical of their effectiveness to prevent the virus from spreading. It’s not as though I think they are ineffective. Rather, I do not think they are nearly as effective as is claimed. However, I am convinced of their power to make other people feel safer. So, I wear one. When I enter a public place, it is irrelevant to me whether the government has mandated a mask. But what is important to me is that many other humans around me are scared and THEY believe that masks provide a significant level of protection, so it would be rather inhumane of me to increase their level of fear out of some sense of my own right to go “maskless.” So, I put one on so that, whatever fear they may feel, it will not be because of me.

    A commenter above mentioned the need for humility, and she is spot on. But there is another virtue that is needed and one that is so intertwined with humility that neither can exist alone: love. There is not a single question of conduct that cannot be correctly answered with the question, “What is the loving thing to do?”

    Paul wrote that love is kind, is not rude, and does not seek its own. No matter what the politicians say, love says in this time of fear, “wear a mask.”

    1. “What is the loving thing to do?” is an excellent question that I don’t think enough people consider. Thank you for reminding us of this very important guidepost for our behavior. I do believe that masks are effective in containing the virus and that we could do a better job preventing spread if more people wore them consistently. I am very glad you choose to wear one despite your doubts. Thank you for your thoughts and for sharing this post to your FB profile!

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