For Wondrous Words Wednesday, a look at the word discipline. To find more word discussions visit Kathy, blogger at Bermuda Onion and hostess of the Wondrous Words meme, where people share interesting words they’ve discovered.
A child of mine tried to sneak out of the house this morning with something forbidden. (I’m keeping details vague because sometimes my kids read my blog, and I don’t need to receive any more glares than I already do.) Needless to say, the situation called for yelling , lecturing , discipline. I’m trying hard these days not to over react, and before I addressed the mischievous child, I reminded myself of the original meaning of “discipline.”
Discipline dates back to the 13th century and took its meaning from the Old French word descepline “physical punishment, teaching,” and from Latin disciplina : “instruction given, teaching, learning, knowledge”. The militaristic meaning “orderly conduct as a result of training” comes from about 1500. Thanks, etymonline.com.
“Instruction given” – that’s the piece I clung to while speaking with my child about honesty and communication. The kids are getting older, and I want to balance limits and consequences with teaching. As a good friend said to me recently, soon my children will not be under my constant supervision (e.g.they will take off in a car with friends), and I will have to trust that they make good decisions.
Yikes. Parenting isn’t for the faint of heart.
Hopefully, they will remember lessons and not lectures. But I’m already accused of ranting, so…
Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about strict parental guidelines, but I don’t want my discipline to be so harsh that my children get frustrated and miss the wisdom I’m trying to impart.
What does the word discipline mean to you? Where do you stand on the punishment/ lesson continuum?
I know, I was out there. I spent a year teaching middle school kids with learning disabilities and behavior disorders. (I know ALL middle schoolers exhibit crazy behavior at some point, but these guys truly had special needs.)
One of the highlights of my year in teaching was getting my kids excited about books (shock!). I’ll never forget the day I went to visit one of my notorious students in ISS (in-school suspension) and found him nose-in-book! Sure, he was trapped in a small room for six hours, but he actually told me he liked the story.
For a kid who rarely cracked a book cover, that was huge.
So when my friend Michelle told me about a friend of hers who is teaching in a county alternative school, I took interest. The poor thing is stuck out in the annex of the old middle school without access to a library.
How can she get kids excited about books if there isn’t a library?
This teacher gets book donations from friends, unfortunately a ton of Twilight… nothing against Stephenie Meyer, but… To provide a quality learning experience, this teacher needs classroom sets of great young adult literature. But how can she get them?
Author Joy Jones had a nice piece in the September/October issue of the SCBWI Bulletin encouraging writers to embrace the practice of giving books for charity. She highlighted the following resources; I scoured their sites for details.
Resources for acquiring books to share with kids in need
Barnes and Noble:
Barnes and Noble offers sponsorships to organizations that meet “the Barnes and Noble mission” and the following criteria:
Organization must be in a community with a Barnes and Noble store
Organization must serve the greater good of the community
Partnerships should include in-store events, visibility, and a wide reach.
Strives to give educators access to high quality books and materials for children in need.
Has given over 120 million books to children from low-income families
97% of all revenue goes directly to providing new books to children in need
Partners with schools serving low-income students (these schools usually have pitiful funding)
To apply to First Book for resources, you will need:
Taxpayer ID
Proof of non-profit status or letter stating your organization serves children from low-income families
The percentage of low-income children served by your organization (as demonstrated by the number of children eligible for free lunch, food stamps, Medicaid, etc.). First Book usually requires that 70% of children be low-income or that the school is a Title 1 school.
Grants money for books and other reading materials to libraries and community groups with limited resources. They accept grants year round and evaluate applications in the fall and spring. Grants range from $500 to $5000, with the average being $2000.
To apply for a grant, you must provide:
A statement of need and an explanation of how the grant will help
Ms. Jones has published multiple children’s books, including Tambourine Moon. Her charity work has provided over 600 books to schools in her area, even though she isn’t a millionaire. She started The Story Gift Project to encourage more young readers. Unfortunately, when I went to her site, the link to The Story Gift Project didn’t work. I will try to contact her and update this post with relevant information ASAP.
Do your part to make sure all kids have access to quality books
Share this post, especially with educators and people who work for non-profits that serve kids
Consider donating to First Book, the National Home Library Foundation, or The Story Gift Project
Do you know of other organizations that help get books into kids’ hands? Please share!
Do you like to learn about the history and meaning of words? Then you’re in the right place. Wondrous Words Wednesday is a weekly meme for people who like to dig into words. Visit Kathy at Bermuda Onion to learn more.
My word this week won’t be new to you, but I bet it’s etymology will surprise you. I recently attended a workshop given by David Benzel called “To Push or Not to Push: What Your Child Needs to Succeed.” David founded the non-profit organization Growing Champions for Life which offers education to sports parents on how to foster a healthy relationship with their children.
David offered practical advice for how to parent without pressure, including:
focus on effort and progress more than talent or results
all competitive events end with either success or a lesson (note: not failure)
motivation comes from inside, so we can’t motivate our children, but we can inspire them
All this was great, and the mom in me loved what he had to say (and feared that I have some characteristics of the “Tiger Parent”. Oh dear.)
But the word nerd in me perked up when he ended his presentation talking about a word we hear so much in sports: compete. Especially in our country, people use “battle language” when they talk about competition.
Beat, destroy, annihilate, kill.
But the word comes from a very different place.
compete: verb from Latin competere to seek together, from Latin com- + petere to come together, agree, to go to
David suggested that we should help our children see how to use competition to strive together to improve. This especially applies to situations that have an individual focus within a team setting, like swimming, track, or wrestling, but this approach can work anywhere, in sports, school, and among siblings.
Wow. To strive together. That sounds so much better than “attack”, doesn’t it?
Word Nerd Workout
Did you know the origin of the word “compete”? How can its etymology change the way you think and talk about competition with your kids/self/friends?
I don’t do scary. I’m 43 years old with the imagination of a kindergartener. Clowns wig me out. But since it’s Halloween, I braved a spooky story for you. Luckily, even though it’s about nightmares, it didn’t give me any.
Dream Boy, by Mary Crockett and Madelyn Rosenberg, tells the story of Annabelle, a teen who dreams of the perfect boy and then watches him walk into her chemistry class. (Yes, as a real guy!) He’s gorgeous, athletic, and very attentive, but Annabelle quickly learns that if her dreams can enter her world, so can her nightmares.
And Annabelle’s nightmare is a creepy, milky eyed little girl who wants to kill her. (Cue the violins.)
What I Liked
I read Dream Boy in three days – that’s saying something, since I have four children and am struggling to keep my head above water during the peak of soccer season. Set in the fictional town of Chilton, Virginia, (which could be the next town over from me), Dream Boy is filled with familiar details of high school, including pom poms, Homecoming, and unrequited love. But the paranormal twist piqued my curiosity. Crockett and Rosenberg blur the line between the real world and the dream world, and they throw in a few surprises at the end.
The characters feel real and compelling. Annabelle’s super smart best friend Will reminds me of my own son, who likes to spout out academic trivia whenever he gets the chance. Annabelle finds herself torn between the imperfect yet comfortable Will and the dreamy Martin. The novel subtly raises a question or two about “the perfect guy”, suggesting that what we dream about isn’t always best for us.
Also, Annabelle is a brave lead, and I love those, especially girls. Here she is as she tracks down her nightmare:
And here’s the thing about being scared: When it’s actually happening, and you’re not just thinking about how it might happen, the fear does something strange. It’s almost like it sets you free.
I don’t mean it disappears. It’s still there, crushing your lungs, tangling your stomach into knots. But you can see it for what it is. You can see how little it matters next to what needs to be done.
Wow, a great thing to remember, even if the thing we fear isn’t an eerie little girl but a hard assignment or a dreaded confrontation.
Recommendation
Dream Girl is great YA paranormal fun, even for younger teens. The tension moves the story, but there’s nothing too frightening. (Trust me, I have a low threshold for fear.)
When you come across a word you don’t know in a book, do you look it up? If so, you’re in the right place. Welcome to Wondrous Words Wednesday, a meme for word nerds who want to improve their vocabulary. Visit Kathy at Bermuda Onion to learn more.
My word this week comes from the YA novel Dream Boy by Mary Crockett and Madelyn Rosenberg. It’s a paranormal thriller with this tag line: “If dream can come true, so can nightmares.” Perfect for Halloween, right? I enjoyed the book and will have a full review for you on Friday.
Here’s a snippet from the climax, when Annabelle, the protagonist, must track down her nightmare:
“If we go to the woods, we find the girl. If we find her, we find Stephanie.” And Martin, I added silently.
“Syllogism,” Will said automatically. “I’ll drive.”
Annabelle’s brainy friend Will always spouts out intellectual trivia, and I couldn’t follow him that time.
Syllogism \’si-lə-ji-zəm\ noun from Greek syn + logizesthai to calculate, from logos reckoning;
a formal argument in logic that is formed by two statements and a conclusion which must be true if the two statements are true
a crafty argument
deductive reasoning
Word Nerd Workout
Think of a character who uses syllogism. I’ve got a great example: Sherlock Holmes! Who can you think of?
I recently heard Rosanne Cash say in an interview that the greatest gift her father (Johnny Cash) gave her was his list of 100 essential country music songs. This got me thinking, what would be on my list of essential books that I’d give to my kids?
Please welcome my guest, Eli Pacheco, loving father, passionate soccer coach, and hilarious writer. I met Eli through his Coach Daddy Blog; every one of his posts not only makes me laugh, but also gets me thinking. Visit him often for a refreshing dose of wit and a little bit of junk food. I’m thrilled he’s here today to share his “essentials” for his three girls. Get ready to smile. 😉
My dad and I didn’t spend a lot of time talking books.
Football, yes. Life, sure. Women … let’s just say dad was a Mary Ann guy.
Me? Ginger.
One book my dad did tell me about was Catcher in the Rye. The angst-driven teen antagonist Holden Caulfield struck a chord somewhere in my father. And I felt it too, on some level. I always remembered that. Even as we rooted for rival football teams and drifted to opposite ends of the political spectrum.
Julia Tomiak has given me a unique opportunity today.
I’ve collected three books, three CDs and three quotes to lock into a time capsule for my three daughters. Some choices were easy; others took some digging. Which books, CDs and quotes would you wrap up for your kids?
3 Books
Sun Also Rises, Ernest Hemingway
I first read this book as a high school senior. I’ve taken it on every trip I’ve taken since. Each time I read it, it says to me something different. I still can’t, after more than 20 years reading it, describe just how the characters have helped to shape me. But they have.
They Call Me Coach, John Wooden
I wish I could have spoken with the late great coach once, just once. He definitely spoke to me. His emphasis on the individual’s role on the team inspires me as a coach and dad. Humility, hard work, and faith fueled a man far greater than the national championship banners he helped to win.
Call of the Wild, Jack London
This was my first real book – that didn’t have pictures or a choose-your-own-adventure ending. I still have the copy I scribbled my name in as a kid. This book made me feel grown up; I had to read about a harsh reality, but also love and loyalty. I might not have recognized it, but it was there.
3 CDs
Rhythm of the Saints, Paul Simon
I found this as a teenager, too, and the messages and voices I heard weren’t always understood. But they were always pondered. To me, the album took bits of time and place and strung them together in this brilliant parade of words. All with a tribal, earth-bound drumbeat.
Listen Without Prejudice, George Michael
Thoughtful, and moody. I found this album during college. My friends went to fight in the first Gulf War, and I stayed behind to flounder as an English major at UNC Charlotte. “Freedom” stirred me (still does). “Praying for Time” didn’t give me the answers I sought, but it shaped my search.
Blue Light, Harry Connick Jr.
I used to go to the Cone Center at UNCC and rent this CD while I studied. It was the counterbalance to the heavy feel of George Michael’s album, perhaps. Here’s what’s cool: “He Is, They Are” is about a dad and his kids. I was years from kids … but these words planted the seeds for me.
3 Quotes
These three quotes sum up what is so important to me – stewardship to my fellow-man, sharing our stories, and keeping dreams alive, no matter how old we get.
The Emerson quote is often said to be credited wrongly; it doesn’t matter to me. It’s the message of finding fulfillment in improving the conditions around you. Phillip Putnam put just the right weight on stories. What are we without them? Blogs would be nothing more than pumpkin recipes without stories.
And lastly – Elvis. I still believe in what The King says. No, I didn’t end up being even Elvis the Pelvis, but I continue to dream like I did as a kid. I’m the quarterback. The humble star. The superhero.
I’d love for my kids to find a little of that in their capsule, too.
To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
After nourishment, shelter and companionship, stories are the thing we need most in the world.
Phillip Putnam
When I was a boy, I always saw myself as a hero in comic books and in movies. I grew up believing this dream.
Elvis Presley
Now it’s your turn. Eli and I want to know: what “essentials” would you like to share with your kids?
For Wondrous Words Wednesday, a look at the word discipline. To find more word discussions visit Kathy, blogger at Bermuda Onion and hostess of the Wondrous Words meme, where people share interesting words they’ve discovered.
“Instruction given” – that’s the piece I clung to while speaking with my child about honesty and communication. The kids are getting older, and I want to balance limits and consequences with teaching. As a good friend said to me recently, soon my children will not be under my constant supervision (e.g.they will take off in a car with friends), and I will have to trust that they make good decisions.
