Every year, as I seek to shorten my list of Christmas to dos, and therefore limit my holiday exhaustion, I ponder The Christmas Card.  Is it worth coercing my people to pose for a picture?  And if yes, what should we wear?  Should I write a letter, or is a brief blurb on the back of the card enough?

The Christmas Card takes a lot of energy: assembling the family unit; enduring the grumbling; running between the tripod and the family huddle before the shutter timer goes off; designing the perfect photo card; choosing the perfect words.  And then there’s the mail merge  (I don’t print mailing labels enough; each year I must relearn the process) and the hours spent signing, stamping, sealing.

Christmas would be simpler without The Card.

But I love GETTING cards.  I can’t wait to see how families and friends have grown and changed over the year.  I lament that in many cases, communication has been reduced to this annual ritual, and yet I’m thankful to at least have that.  I devour the letters that come with cards; I wish more did.

And so, every year,  I make the photo card and compose the letter.  I never use verse or acrostics (some people are very creative!), but write a family update, allowing one paragraph for each Tomiak.  I try to keep it real with snippets and quotes from our daily lives.  I avoid boasts and saccharine sweet sentiments. I hope to create something informative and entertaining.

This year, as if they heard my doubts, a few friends and family have made the time to tell me how much they love and look forward to my letter.  I appreciate the fact that in this busy world, at this busy time, if people make the effort to complement you, they usually mean it.

So The Christmas Card is a tradition I will keep.  Which of course leads to the Word Nerd question, how did the tradition of sending cards start?

Way back in 1843, in Victorian England, a man named Henry Cole had a problem: too many friends.  The custom of sending a Christmas letter had been around for a long time in England, but it got even more popular with the introduction of the “penny post”.  People could send a card or letter anywhere in the country for just one cent.  Mr. Cole didn’t want to neglect his duties of correspondence, but he simply didn’t have enough time to write everyone in his social circles.  So he had an idea.

Mr. Cole asked his friend J.C. Horsley, an artist, to create a Christmas illustration.  Cole printed that image on 5×3 inch pieces of cardboard with the generic greeting,  “A Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to You.”  Cole could still personalize the postcard by writing a name at the top, but the bulk of the work was done, and the first Christmas Card was made.

It took awhile for the tradition to catch on in the United States.  Louis Prang, a Prussian immigrant with a print shop near Boston, created the first Christmas card in the United States in 1875.  The custom didn’t truly get popular until 1915 when the founders of what would eventually become the Hallmark company introduced a new format for the card: bigger, folded like a book, mailed in an envelope.  The business boomed in the 1930s and 1950s and continues to be popular today.

It seems to me, we are going back to the original idea of a decorative post card.  Most of the cards I get are a single page, usually with a picture and a sentiment.  I love them, and I keep many displayed throughout the year as a reminder of friends and family who live far away.

If you’d like to learn more about the history of The Christmas Card, visit Smithsonian.com.

Do you send holiday cards?  What format do you prefer?  What do you do with the holiday cards you receive?

Happy Holidays!

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have a confession to make: part of me dreads Christmas.  I hear the opening lines of “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year”, and I think, No, it’s not.  For me, the mother of four, Christmas means work.  Thinking of presents, buying the presents, hiding the presents, wrapping the presents.  And that’s just for the kids.  What about friends, extended family, coworkers and teachers?  It’s overwhelming.  Especially when you’re a person who doesn’t like stuff or shopping.

I hate the fact that inflatable snow men start popping up around Halloween, and the local pop station plays nothing but the same 30 holiday songs from the day after Thanksgiving until December 26^th.  I hate that the focus has shifted from the gift of a savior and peace on earth to Black Friday deals and endless consumption.

And then there’s the memory of moving my mother into a nursing home on a December day 23 years ago and of her death a few weeks later.  “Have a Holly Jolly Christmas” makes me cry because back then it was the only thing that made her laugh, and I will always listen to “Oh Holy Night”, Mom’s favorite Christmas carol, with tears streaming down my cheeks.

So when husband asked if we wanted to put up Christmas decorations on the Sunday after Thanksgiving, I said no. I wasn’t there, mentally, physically or spiritually.

But shortly thereafter, I listened to episode 196 of the “Happier” podcast, one of my favorites.  Host Gretchen Rubin suggested that listeners choose a holiday motto by picking word or phrase to guide their experience of the holiday season and focus their attention on what is important.  One of her listeners chose “Comfort and joy”, and will center her holiday activities and gifts on this theme.  Rubin chose “ ’tis the season to be jolly”, because, as a somewhat “Type A” personality, Rubin often gets irritable and snappish, especially when busy.  Her sister Elizabeth Craft chose “all is calm, all is bright” to remind her that everything is good and to just go with the flow over the holidays.

I loved this idea.  As soon as I heard it, I felt relieved.  If I can frame my experience of the holidays with a motto, I can participate meaningfully in the season and not just react to it.  And if my motto is from a song, so much the better.  Words set to music are easier for me to remember and pull up for inspiration.

I chose my motto from a lesser known Christmas song, one a talented young lady sings almost every year at our church.  “Be Born in Me”, by Francesca Battistelli, describes Mary’s reaction upon learning she is to bear God’s son.  The opening lines of the song, “Everything inside me cries for order/ everything inside me wants to hide” cut to my soul.  I relate too well to the doubt and inadequacy expressed in the lyrics of this song.  Mary pleads, “Somehow help me see with heaven’s eyes” and finally, in the chorus, “Be born in me.”  She’s asking for God to fill her, not just with the physical presence of the baby Jesus, but with all consuming faith.

My holiday motto, “Be born in me”, reminds me to clear my heart of worry and stress so that it can be filled with faith.  I, too, want to see with heaven’s eyes.

Now I pass on Rubin’s suggestion to you.  Whether you love everything Christmas, right down to the Elf on the Shelf, or the holidays bring stress and sadness, choose a holiday motto to frame your experience of the season. It can be gratitude or service, fun or family, “Let it snow” or “Goodwill to men.”

However you celebrate, and whatever you celebrate, I wish you, and this world, peace.

How do you plan to experience the holidays this year?

Thanks for getting thoughtful with me,